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Dustin clutched the note his fiancée , Priscilla, had left on his nightstand. An oily patch stained the centre of her pink, scented stationery, obscuring a good portion of what she had written.
“Stupid, dumb fried chicken! She always tells me, ‘Don’t eat in bed.’ But what does she know about getting hungry in the middle of the night?” Dustin had accidentally plopped a gnawed-on, greasy chicken wing right on top of her note during last night’s midnight snack. He squinted through his thick glasses, which were held together with black electrical tape in the middle, broken from stepping on them when he tossed them on the floor one day. His fingers left little black smudges on the sides of the pretty flowered paper as he struggled to read the note:
Dusty, my dear! I am off to the country to complete the preparations for our wedding this afternoon. As we talked about, I’ve left you with a few tasks I just know you will be able to fulfill today, as my trust in you is unwavering. I have faith in your memory, but in case you’re too full of wedding jitters, here’s what you have to finish before I see you at the church at six o’clock:
Love you darling, and see you this evening!
Hugs and kisses,
Your wife-to-be, Priss
“Dumb number three is missing!” Dustin held the paper up to the window, but nothing helped. The chicken grease had completely dissolved the last instruction. “Stupid chicken!” He smacked his hand on his forehead and groaned, then looked at the clock. “Only 11 o’clock... maybe I should sleep on this.” Dustin put his head back on his pillow and closed his eyes, wishing he had some chicken to chew on.
The phone’s ringing woke him up four hours later.
“Three o’clock?!” Dustin sprang from his bed, stepping down hard on his glasses that had fallen off his face while he had slept. “And now this!” He ran to the corner of the room and sifted through a pile of dirty laundry on the floor, grumbling under his breath the whole time. He flung pants and shirts up in the air until he finally found a pair of jeans without any noticeable food stains on them. “Guess this will have to do,” he said.
Once outside, he drove his rundown Jeep to the tailor to pick up his suit. When he got there, the tailor asked him to try it on, just to make sure the adjustments had been made properly.
“No time, no time!” Dustin grabbed the pants and jacket and threw them over his shoulder. He tossed them into the back of the Jeep and hopped back in, ready to race off to his next stop. As he started driving toward the florist, he checked his watch.
“No time, no time,” he exclaimed. Pulling over to the side of the road, he yanked out a few of the dandelions and daisies that were growing along the highway. “These will have to do. Besides, they’re awfully pretty.”
For the next few hours, Dustin drove toward the quaint country church Priscilla had picked out. He was only half an hour late so far. He yanked off his shirt while driving, and pulled on the new one, barely noticing all the wrinkles. When he finally pulled up to the church, he changed into his tuxedo pants while ducking behind his car. The legs had been hemmed too short and because he had forgotten to put on socks, his ankles were clearly visible.
“Doesn’t matter... Priss likes my ankles anyway.” He straightened his collar and fixed his tie, and dashed into the church, wilting dandelions in hand.
Priscilla stood at the back of the church, where she had been waiting for over an hour. She always showed up to events at least thirty minutes early. Her white dress was crisp and clean, her face scrubbed pink and her hair pulled up tightly in a bun. She was stunning, and smiled widely when she saw her Dusty finally appear at the church’s door.
“Finally, my dear!”
“Sorry, sorry,” Dustin mumbled, and put the flowers in her hand.
“No pink roses?” Priscilla frowned a little. “And couldn’t you have maybe taken a shower? Perhaps shaved before coming?”
“Yellow suits you better, Priss. And you always say how you like a little scruff on my face.”
Priscilla’s diamond earrings sparkled as she shook her head. “Very, very true, darling. Now let’s get this started!” She gave Dustin a little push and sent him down the aisle, and followed closely once the organ music had started.
The ceremony went wonderfully, and finally it was time to exchange rings.
“Dusty, dear?” Priscilla leaned into Dustin and whispered into his ear. “Where are the rings?”
Dustin groaned. That was the third thing on the list she had left him. He hung his messy head. “I forgot them.”
Priscilla looked panicked for a minute, and then sighed. “It’s a good thing I love you, dear,” she whispered. She reached up and pulled the gold and diamond hoop earrings from her ears. “These will have to do,” she said, and passed one to him.
“Opposites attract,” they whispered to each other as they leaned in for their first kiss as a married couple.